Surly in summer

All those things about friendly store assistants I take back. I had Cruella de Ville and her equally surly sister yesterday. One in Barnes and Noble where I was happily spending my father's birthday present to me (a very nice gift voucher), and then one in Century 21 where I was buying some shoes. I seem to end up with a lot of USD100 notes, and these really are not welcome currency around the place. I had to wait for AGES in Century 21 to buy some shoes (I don't know how people work so slowly), and only one register was taking cash - all the others were cards only (?? how does that work, I can understand cash only if the bank systems are down, but cards only??!). So after patiently standing for 10 minutes while one person was served I finally got to the head of the queue. My shoes were USD29.99, and I handed over one of my USD100 notes. This is a large store for those who haven't been, where they have plenty of cash. She looked at it like it was dirt, and sniffed up at me "Do you have anything smaller?" Well, I did, but I wanted the change and had queued for the privilege. So I just said mildly "No, that's why I have queued in your line for 10 minutes". Needless to say we didn't speak again as I completed the transaction.
Maybe it is the heat. The heat is like a wall when you walk outside. A hot sweaty wall. Kind of like a forcefield in a science fiction show, but one where it collapses on you like a big sticky spiders web. Lovely huh? I am, however, breezing through the crowds in a cool summer work dress, snappy high heels and my hair up, large sunglasses and good posture, admired by all who behold me. I like to imagine I am very Audrey Hepburn-esque --- until I catch a glimpse in a window as I walk by and see a medium height, chunky person charging through crowds with people flying out of my way, giving me dirty looks as I elbow them aside. We can all dream I guess - my posture is good though.
People have also become very attached to the two little words "Excuse me". Twice in two days on the weekend I ran into this - the first time was in Wholefoods, as I walked past three large fat people ambling slowly around the store. Well, as I was passing the one on the right, she took a sidestep so I bumped her bag slightly. I kept on walking, as this was one of those unavoidable knocks - she walked into me. If I had been her I would have realised this. She, on the other hand, didn't. "ExxcccUUUUUUUUUSSssse MAAAHYEEEE!" I hear brayed from behind me. "Thasss whut peeple saaaayy when they knock intuh someone, exxccccUUUUSssssse maahhyeeee!" I had had it by this time, so I turned around, smiled very sweetly everywhere but my eyes, and said "Please excuse me for knocking into your bag. It was completely involuntary and I am so sorry for any inconvenience caused to you or your friends". Needless to say intelligence was inversely proportionate to size, and I got a "humph, well thass okay then". Yeah right.
Then yesterday on the tube downtown these two lovely men got on and inadvertently stepped in front of a girl trying to get on as well. They just kept going (which is kind of what you do, as there are some real shovers out there, they really hadn't done anything). Well, for the next few stops, it was all "Waahhl, some people jess doan know how to say exxccuUUUUse mahyeee anymore, why doan people say exccccuuuuUUUUsse me..." You get the picture. So obviously we all need to learn some manners and rediscover excuse me's... Or just start taking taxis everywhere. Tough choice really!

Lavatories

A topic I have been trying to avoid as I don't like to dwell on the negative, but it is now time to be honest. I hate US loos! Restrooms, bathrooms, facilities, ablutions, whatever you want to call them, I don't know how they developed the mechanism that they have in America. Basically a giant pond, which is about one foot off the ground. When I was 15 my school required me to do community service once a month (everyone had to, it wasn't like a punishment for bad behaviour - I am of course the person that get certificates for diligence and full attendance at school!). I chose to do my volunteering at a kindergarten... where I had to use the kindy toilets - they were about 30cm off the ground. Well, if you expanded the toilets into giant ponds that are 30cm off the ground, then welcome to America. Just awful. I was just reading on Just Jared that apparently when Madonna travels she has to have a new toilet seat installed everywhere she stays, which is destroyed when she leaves "so it doesn't end up on ebay"! Whilst I would not be bidding for Madonna's loo seat on ebay, I do envy the action of always having a new pristine seat. I hate foreign toilet seats. When RRPP moved into my flat in the UK, she purchased a new toilet seat. There is nothing wrong with this.
Now, so that I don't seem unreasonable, I have travelled through China and SE Asia, and have a nasty acquaintance with the squat toilet facilities, which you did get used to over time (although I won't be installing one), but it is completely unhygienic and very offputting to have to avail oneself of the pond.
Glad I got that off my chest, promise not to mention it again!

Love Island and other adventures

... I still have a minor on-off headache. Still mildly interesting, but I am wearing my glasses at work which does help (although it doesn't very attractive).
I haven't had a chance to miss Love Island as RRPP is keeping me up to date. Of course she is now finally at the stage where she is admitting that she does love Brendan. There are all sorts of caveats of course "who else would you be with?" and "he isn't so bad" and then some gushing about how he won the Strongest Man competition... concerning.
I am also planning my days whilst in Washington, so if anyone has any suggestions for must sees, let me know ....
So what else is going on? Well, I am now a regular on the subway to and from work. Very easy and convenient (and air-conditioned). I am on the local trains too so usually get a seat. I did notice a very interesting print advert on the subway this morning. There was a picture of 4 people, with the caption "As a Jew I was not interested in Jesus, until..." and then the pictures show them all smiling, and asking you to check out the website for "Jews for Jesus"????!!!! Fascinating. I was almost tempted to check it out, but managed to restrain myself. How much stranger can things get. Normally the adverts are just for English as a foreign language... I am trying to ration my trips to Sephora. And I am also getting engrossed in the new Project Runway (love Heidi Klum - I am going to start saying Auf Wiedersehen when I leave the office at night). They are so catty on that program too - just fantastic. New episode on tonight, and I can't wait. It made it much more real too when I watch Miss Universe (god bless Donald Trump, who rescued that beauty pageant from obscurity, wonder why??). The second challenge on Project Runway was for the designers to come up with a dress for the evening wear section of the show, and Kayne won (a rather lavender-ish designer whose sisters are all pageant queens). Well, Tara (Miss USA) actually wore the dress. She made it to the final 5 in the competition, but unfortunately was 4th runner up - I guess that kind of means she came last! She would need lightning to strike 4 people before she can wrestle that crown off Miss Puerto Rico who actually won. What they didn't show is that 3 minutes after Miss Puerto Rico was crowned she half fainted and had to be carried off the stage. So now the rumours are going around about anorexia and not eating on the day to get through the swimsuit competition. Carson Daly (from Queer Eye for the Straight Guy) was there for "comments" and was really nasty about the contestants of course. Right down to saying some of the contestants in their bikins had short legs, and didn't have "snappy turns" or "weren't selling it!". It was a meat market. So bad it actually wasn't that hypnotic. But anyway, I ended up watching it mainly because of Project Runway ...

Some of my favourite things ...

1. The way that when it rains in NY, every store stations a couple of their staff at the door with plastic bags open, ready to receive your dripping umbrellas. That way you can carry them in the bag while you are browsing with no drips or wet slaps against your leg - I know it is probably OH&S drive, but I love it!
2. The hot chocolates at work - we have a very funky machine where you insert little sachets. However I read the ingredients today of the hot chocolate: sugar, skim milk, cocoa "processed with alkali", hydrogenated coconut oil, glucose syrup, salt, sodium caseinate, mono- & diglycerides of fatty acids, soya lecithin, dipotassium phosphate, sodium citrate, artificial flavour, silicon dioxide. Not one of my favourite things anymore - if you took out the first 3 ingredients that sounds like sunscreen!!
3. Planning a trip. Whilst SM (Sindy's Mom) is in town we are taking a side trip to Washington. After spending half a months salary on train tickets (wow Amtrak is certainly covering costs), we are off to spend a couple of nights in the capital, staying at a rather nice looking B&B called the Akwaaba DC. http://www.akwaaba.com/about_akwaaba/index.html Will let you know how it goes. So I have my guide book, have mapped where I want to go, and am starting on the itinerary!
4. Sunshine - more of it today, and I am still smiling.
5. American customer service. They really do know how to do it here. I went to buy the Amtrak tickets at Penn Station (stupid overseas credit cards don't work here as they check everything back to the billing address, which has to be in the US. Problem for those of us without local credit facilities...) and the queue moved very fast, and the lady I got at the end of it was lovely and efficient (probably helped that I gave her the printout of the trains I wanted).
6. Wholefoods queuing system: at the local supermarket they have three queues all for the same set of about 30 registers. You join the shortest queue. how does this work? Well, as each register becomes available, the head of each queue takes it in turns to go to that available register. So the size of people's purchases is completely immaterial, just pick the line with the shortest number of people, and you will get served in order! This is brilliant for me as I have a gift for choosing the slowest moving line in supermarkets - here that can't happen!
7. American stereotypes: they really are true and they surround you every day - fat policemen eating donuts; rude taxi drivers who drive like maniacs; steaming subway vents (although they have funky funnels they put over them now, so the steam comes out 8 feet in the air); people speaking with every second word being "like"; people saying "you're welcome" every time you say thankyou and meaning it ... the list goes on and on.
8. Sephora stores that stock Philosophy! Yesterday I did buy the Unplastic Surgery, and it is FANTASTIC. Even nicer was the delightful girl who served me, who said "You aren't buying this for yourself are you?" I did my usual when confronted with such questions and lied, saying "No, why?" and she said "Well, this is a wrinkle treatment and you don't have any! If it was for you I wouldn't sell it to you!" After wanting to reach over and kiss her for being so nice and so blind simultaneously, I did lie further and confess that it was for RRPP, my much older sister. I used it on my frown lines when I got home, and they really did smooth out - this is miracle stuff!

I have a headache...

I put it down to too much sun. At lunchtime today I escaped from the icebox that is my office, and went to get some lunch. Today I knew what I wanted, and where to get it (rare roast beef, parmigiano and arugula with mustard in a baguette from Pret) - very unusual for me as regular readers would know. However when I emerged into the sunshine, it reminded me of a line from a Betty Macdonald book called The Plague and I - one of my favourite books. It is autobiographical and is about a woman during the Depression in the USA who gets tuberculosis and goes to a state funded sanitorium. Their method of curing TB then was bedrest in very cool rooms. At one point Betty is with the advanced patients lying out on the verandah in the shade, when a beam of sunlight hits the back of her head. She was so cold that she said she felt like a frozen chicken that had just been slid into the warm oven. I never really knew what that felt like until today. The sun was so wonderful hitting me after the cold office, that I positively basked, wallowed and melted my way along 6th avenue. Normally I would head into the subway passages to avoid crossing all the streets between me and my lunch, but today I welcomed little red crossing men as it meant I could stand longer and soak up some more rays... Lovely!
That of course made me remember smugly that I had put sunscreen on my face this morning. Whilst in the UK RRPP decided to provide me with some gifts for my birthday (lovely of her). Amongst these were skincare products from the Philosophy range. Well, I have never been a cosmetics/skincare person (not hard to guess looking at me), but with my advanced years I knew something had to be done so I made some hints to RRPP. Now RRPP has tried every product there is and is somewhat of an afficionado - you want to know about skincare, ask her. She will generally be found wandering around the first level in Selfridges picking up samples. You want to know how to drywall or change a washer - ask me. Are we really genetically related??
So anyway, I am now back in the land of skincare. With a Sephora around every corner I am now stockpiling Philosophy skincare. Over the weekend I treated myself to an oxygen peel. I now layer on "Save Me" with some "Hope in a Tube" and "Hope is Not Enough" cream once I have cleansed with "Purity made simple". I also have "On a Clear Day" superwash for at night. Hence the need for SPF under my "Hope in a Bottle" during the day. A new guilty secret to hide. I may sneak back tonight and get the "Pigment of your Imagination" or maybe "Unplastic Surgery", just to annoy her.
Now, none of this has anything to do with my headache I am sure. Intellectually I find my headaches very interesting. I don't get the bog standard ones very often - maybe once a year or so. I do get migraines every now and then but they are a whole different kettle of fish! I think this headache may be to do with being at work. After a lovely weekend shopping (yes, me, shopping, not one of my favourite things, but it is so EASY here), and watching the Open golf while on the bike in the gym (had to slip that in too), I think my body does not want me to be at work. So I am going to listen to my body. And go home...

Food - good or bad?

I have been thinking a lot about food today for a change, mainly because a Sindyinnewyork reader decided to point out how much of the time I do mention food. Also, as you walk along the airbridges onto aircraft in London, HSBC has a lot of advertising plastered up, and the ones that got me were four separate posters sequentially along the wall. The first has a picture of gooey chocolate cake, and the caption "bad"; the next had a picture of broccoli and the caption "good" the next had the same picture of gooey chocolate cake, with the caption "good" and the final one had the broccoli again with "bad". That kind of sums up my relationship with food really, in that I think about both of those food items in that way. But recently I have started to think more that food is to be enjoyed. I have never been able to stick to diets. Totally different to my mother and RRPP, who can pick a diet and stick to it like limpets. I have no food control, I instead say to myself "guess I'll just have to spend another half hour in the gym tonight" ignoring the fact that I won't be spending 2 minutes in the gym tonight! Last night I had my first slice of Junior's cheesecake (apparently the best in NY, which is of course the home of cheesecake. I had the raspberry swirl. I always thought Philadelphia was the home of cheesecake, what with the philly cream cheese link, but I was misinformed, Philadelphia is the home of cheesesteak, a delicacy I have yet to try). Well, the Juniors slice was pretty special, and I am a cheesecake connoisseur, or so I like to think. Might have another slice tonight, although I did go to the gym this morning.
However RRPP is now on her own special diet. She is preparing a food diary for her personal trainer, who apparently can't see why his efforts aren't paying off. Her diary went as follows:
Breakfast: One egg mayo and water cress sandwich plus mozzarella and tomato croissant; hot chocolate
Lunch: Avocado salad wrap; Chunky Kit kat
Dinner: pasta with salsa and copious quantities of cheese grated over it and a few good glasses of wine, plus a couple of twix snacks.
Personal trainer is apparently a cross between Carl Lewis and Djimon Hounsou, so may not like the KitKat additions to her healthy diet!
I think she is also getting extra exercise leopard crawling to avoid the feral next door neighbour (FNDN). It seems that FNDN has launched an all out assault - her weapon of choice is the wilted leaves off a nasty vine which I pushed back through the lattice whilst in London. This is one of those nasty vines that grows a foot a day, has horrible curly sucker things, and giant leaves that bring your skin out in a rash. It needed to go. Unfortunately I did it on a hot day so the vine is now on its last branches, and I also forgot that FNDN is old, decrepit and has NOTHING else to do all day but complain. RRPP had already got caught a few times by FNDN in aimless conversations about food, so it was a fair bet that messing with her plant was messing with her. Sure enough, FNDN now spends a great deal of time when not pinging leaves over the fence, in sitting on the back steps shouting "B&RST&RDS" at the top of her voice, and complaining about RRPP to the other neighbours. Hopefully they realise how batty she is and just ignore her. This is why I did not want a back garden!
So I have a big weekend ahead - shopping and watching the golf, and reading some exciting documents for work, all avoiding the thunderstorms that are predicted for work. And maybe some more cheesecake ...

Do I feel like I'm home?

... not sure really. Flew back into JFK last night on a delightful BA 777 aircraft. Flight was fine, trip to airport was no problems - I was on a conference call all the way from packing in the flat to getting off the Heathrow Express at Terminal 4 - certainly takes away the need for a book. I hung out in the BA lounge happily chomping on tomato soup, bagels and salmon and some heavy chocolate slices. Then of course I had to have lunch on the plane as well. I reset my watch as soon as I sat down, and tried to pretend it was really NY time already. Service was fine - the usual dehydrate and please sleep approach from our safety crew. I do love the way that airlines now stress that the flight attendants are there for YOUR safety. But they also throw food at you every now and then... Can you imagine if fire fighters took a break from the station to come out and serve coffee to passers by? Or if the police force every hour or so walked out of their police stations and provided some Krispy Kremes to the homeless? If that really was true, how you would describe your skills set on a resume as a flight attendant - "I can leap buildings in a single bound, survive a smoke filled cabin, direct passengers in event of an emergency landing on water, but I also serve a great cup of cold tea"?? Hmmm.
As usual, my bags were the last ones off the plane, but I was still smiling from my customs experience. They are always so lovely, and I usually get a "you have a nice day now, ma'am" once they are done with the retinal scans.
Wheeled the bags out, and this time my chariot driver did await. He was a small Algerian man (who explained about his problems with humidity), and then was very musical all they way into the city. He reminded me of a camel herder I had in Egypt when climbing Mount Sinai. My knee was not up to the huge climb, so I caught a camel up the mountain (65 Egyptian dollars seemed a bargain). The camel was attended by a lovely man, who every 5 seconds or so of the few hours, would tap the camel on the rump whilst making the following musical noises "heeermmmm, hooorrrrrrm, tsk tsk tsk" and then spit. It was so melodic and relaxing I actually fell asleep on the camel when not looking up at the very starry sky. Well, my chariot driver was a bit the same - every 10 seconds or so he would huff and puff quietly and companiably. More like "sh sh shs sh shsh". It chimed in with my blackberry which did not work for my two weeks in London, and so vibrated constantly for about 20 minutes receiving all the emails it had missed out on. Quite relaxing all in all.
My apartment was waiting for me (taciturn doorman and all), and the flowers were happily dead in their vase. Quite odd - my cleaning ladies had done all the cleaning (twice, which would have been fun the second time since I hadn't been in - dusting anyone?), but apart from propping the dead flowers on the side support of the bed (why?), they seemed unclear as to whether I was becoming all Morticia Addams and liking dead plants, or whether it just isn't in the job description. All good anyway.
I headed out to the supermarket, got some supplies, and unpacked. So am I home or not? I really couldn't say. If home is familiarity it certainly is homely, and I certainly felt good seeing the Manhattan Skyline from the LIE, but I am not sure .... I am not missing Love Island in any case, or the feral next door neighbour in London...

SS is now renamed ...

... yes, it seems on the overnight scuttlebutt, that SS has indeed made it down to Fiji. She is now the Rogue Romantic with the Passion for Pants (RRPP), particularly those of a certain "hunky" ballroom dancer (love a bit of oxymoron in the morning...)
http://loveisland.itv.com/NewsArticle.aspx?nid=105&tid=1

Has anyone missed me?

I am guessing not, since there are no comments saying "where have you been?" and "Long time no post...".
I am enjoying using my UK keyboard - my keyboard in New York has the wrong symbols on it, such that it is a bit of guesswork when you are looking to find the " @ or £ symbols (let alone some more funky ones like the forward slash!). Still, it kept my days interesting when updating the blog in NY time.
I am due back in NY on Tuesday, and the weird thing is that I am looking forward to it - there are some things I miss about being there already, whereas I thought that I would be in the situation where I would be getting dragged on to the plane with each appendage wedged against the door resisting (bit like trying to get a cat into a cat carrier, if you get the analogy). The primary thing drawing me back (shock horror) seems to tbe the gym in the apartment building. Not that it is a great gym, but it is available 24 hours a day 21 floors below me. I seem to be missing it .... Anyone who knows me knows that that is WEIRD. I am also concerned that perhaps if I don't go back, the PTB (powers that be) will decide that leaving the flat empty for 2 weeks in NY is unforgivable, and I should just stay in London.
That is not an option for many reasons - firstly work in London does not fill me with joy - I have been back two weeks and am way too busy - three deals on the go at once as well as ther gumf. I have no time at all to even duck out for a haircut! Secondly, my mother arrives in NY for a 10 day trip in August. Thirdly, three of my good friends arrive in NY beginning September for a long weekend. Fourthly, I really want to have the full NY experience - I have geared myself up for it, and am really enjoying being there. There is also the travel around the US with NY as a base that I am starting to plan too... I want to LIVE, why won't you let me LIVE!
So, very surprisingly, I am keen to get on that plane back on Tuesday - weird hmmm.
London has been so much fun though - as usual my life has revolved around food and will continue to do so. Went to a restaurant on Maiden Lane in Covent Garden called Fire and Stone last night. When I have no particular preference where to go to meet someone for dinner/catchup, I tend to look at the deals on offer on toptable, and pick something to try. So Fire and Stone had a deal where you got any starter, any pizza, and a glass of wine or a beer for £12!! Sounded good to me. I was late (sorry sorry again to my friend - first my work meeting ran over and then there were NO cabs), but we had a great night. Service was attentive, place was really buzzy, and food was great - large portions and no restrictions or "special menus". Whole night worked out to £18 each, with a coffee and extra drink each.
It did make for a late night though, with an early start this morning. If I am getting up early I at least want it to be because I am trolling off to the gym, not to get to work!!
On another note, SS (although she has told me not to call her that, so I will continue doing so to annoy her - gotta love sisters), has banned me from watching Love Island on the few nights I am home. I believe that this is because SS has an unreasonable, unrestrainable attraction to one of the men - Brendan the Kiwi ballroom dancer. Now I can understand this - he is her usual type... dark, slimy, unattractive, very macho and chauvinistic, with just her sense of humour (particularly to do with women). I think she is secretly thinking about stowing away to Fiji to rescue him, and watching the show just makes her realise what she is missing out on... I even get emails from her with links to the show ...
Or alternatively it could be because the show is the most chauvinistic, unfunny, derogatory and humiliating show currently on TV ... slave auction anyone?

Sindy in London ...

Well, I am in London for two weeks so will not be able to add much in the way of New York specific updates. However being back has given me the opportunity to get very hot and sweaty. Apart from the humidity (gee, I don't miss that), temperatures in London are very NY-esque. Since being back I have cleared out my old flat (all those bits that you say "oh, that will fit in a couple of bags" and ends up being three very hot sweaty car loads). Sindy's sister ("SS") was roped in, and after the first few times of being picked up off the floor where she kept on plutzing in horror at the additional amount of stuff that she was expected to store, she gave up making the polite remarks about garden sheds and very cheap alternate storage solution providers. Couple of shoe horns and a lot of heavy lifting, and there is now a giant precarious pile of boxes teetering over me in the spare bedroom as I sleep at night. There is also 5 large black bags of garbage at the old flat ... I don't know what is in the boxes that did make it, and I don't really want to find out. Next weekend ...
SS did get her revenge. At the tender age of 35, SS has discovered gardening ... Sindy is quite happy to benefit from these green tendencies (although discussions about slugs, and correct watering technique with the Charlie Dimmock watering can can pall after about half an hour). But being asked to assist in the moving of "that hydrangea" and "the gum-y thing" didn't sound too bad until standing close to them. Each are planted in a 60cm terracotta-esque (ie plastic) pot, and are conservatively 5ft high and HEAVY. So with SS on one side, and S on the other, bending our knees in the self-satisfied but correct way, we lifted... Unfortunately at that point, we each caught a glimpse of the other's heaving, straining face through the waving pink hydrangea heads, started laughing hysterically, and dropped the pot. This was repeated ad nauseum as we lifted, grunted, hefted, shoved, heaved and dragged the s*dding plant through the hallway from the back courtyard to the front. Not something I want to repeat EVER if possible. But at least the hydrangea looks nicer in the front courtyard, and hopefully will thrive or die - either is fine! Then a repeat process with the large gum-y thing, although that only had to go from one side of the courtyard to the other. Given the courtyard is bricked, dragging worked a treat.
Today, feeling the need to find something to heft, SS decided she would prefer her desk to be upstairs again. SS had some issues with her previous attempt to move the desk downstairs, (refer to Londonmisfit link at the right), but going back up was ever so much easier with two, and gave no opportunity for her to repeat the experience of tobogganing down the stairs on top of the desk again ... so what to heft tomorrow??